Gender based violence

domestic_violence2

If ever he raised his voice at me

Threatened me with a tight fist like a soft ball

Shoved me and did anything that induced pain to me

He was only being a man

My elders told me that so many times while I was single

 

I heard my neighbor’s wife crying the other night

Before that she had a fight with her husband

He was yelling and screaming at her

The sound of his fist pounding her were like the roar of a thunder

I remember seeing her with a badly bruised face the next morning

 

Is it normal for such a terrible thing to happen to a woman?

All the women in my neighborhood have experienced it

None of them have voiced out or seek help

What is it that is holding them back??

When will he beat her up again??

 

Each time it happens

Her children would find comfort in the neighbor’s home

Most children grow up in this kind of environment

One invested with anger, jealousy and suffering

Imagine what goes on in their minds while growing up

 

Last night I had a fight with my spouse

He started swearing at me at the beginning

Surely he was under the influence of liquor

I could not believe the words that were jumping out of his mouth

I felt extremely hurt

It was outrageous

 

Was it something I did that caused him to behave this way??

I kept blaming myself over and over

Maybe I wasn’t being submissive

My actions and behavior were probably the motivation behind this

I was so troubled and confused

 

Then he beat me up

He beat me up so bad he broke my right arm

I cried so hard until I couldn’t breath

And lay on the floor a helpless body

My world was now in total darkness

 

I was now so eager to run away

The pain he had inflicted on me was unbearable

It was the most inhuman act

I never wanted to look at him again

I could have been dead and he wouldn’t care

I was now focused on saving myself

 

Suddenly, he started apologizing

I hate his fake compassion

It almost sounded like he was mocking my existence

He made me look worthless

Was I even prepared for this??

 

I wanted to tell him I was leaving

How he hurt me so much and the pain couldn’t vanish easily

I wanted to take revenge for what he did to me

Enable him to feel exactly what I was feeling

That would at least give me peace

 

But I brushed all those plans aside

My mind was ready to quit but my heart wasn’t

It wasn’t ready to give up on love

I tucked all the hurt and misery away

And prepare myself for a fresh start

I hope that he is true to his words

To never hurt me again

Categories Poetry

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